Oooh Shiny...

“Oooh shiny” ~Homer Simpson (or at least he’s the most attributable to it)

Welcome to the OOOH Shiny generation, those whose lives are so enamored of technology that should they lose the ability to purchase their triple half soy mocha mint latte no whip with a wave of their android phone would simply have a nervous breakdown right there in the middle of Starbucks.

I have taken notice that everyone has some variety of “smart” phone permanently tattooed to their ear (give them time and they’ll be actual tattoos, if the world lasts that long). They all have a million friends on Facebook, but none in real life, they text incessantly, talk on chat programs that would make our parents blush with the utter risqueness of dress that the avatars are allowed to have. Never mind the fact the person on the other end of that never ending sexy avatar most likely needs a hover round to do their grocery shopping for no other reason than they fell victim to what grand daddy used to call “elbers bends” disease, every time your elber (elbow) bends your mouth opens.

Now I understand that some people (but I would be willing to wager not the majority) of those have some actual medical condition that requires the use of such a device, but too often I see them in the store with a basket full of Twinkies.

They also have the attention span of a gnat, the planning capabilities of an artichoke, and wouldn’t know a real book if it jumped up and bit them in the ass. All of this of course courtesy of our technological march toward the grandiose Olduvai Gorge that is coming toward us at a pace heretofore unseen before in human history.

Teachers are now required to “teach to the test” that George W. Bush put into place in an effort to make teachers more accountable, and elevate the worst performing schools to meet the rest of the nation, this has had the net effect of a bunch of small hominids who do nothing but regurgitate rote memorization of the basic facts needed to pass the standards of learning so their teacher doesn’t get fired at the end of the school year.

It however is a very poor method to teach our children to “think” past the end of the test, given a problem to solve (which they should be acquiring the skills to do so) if it falls outside of the parameters of the exam, then they simply cannot fathom how to accomplish this. I have seen it firsthand.

Take all of this and couple it with Facebook, Twitter, and a plethora of other distractions, and it’s no wonder our children cannot do simple things without either immediate gratification, or stick to something long enough to see it through to the end without someone there acting as a drill instructor to get it done.

I work until the sun goes down, how do I know it’s time to stop working? It’s dark outside. I’m not saying that everyone should take this approach, and often times I’ll take a break in the hottest part of the day (on my days off) so as to not kill myself, however as it cools in the evening I return to the task in order to attempt to finish whatever it was I was doing when I stopped earlier in the day.

I’m not going to complain about it, it does no good to do that. At the very least I will acknowledge it, and simply shake my head, what else can I do really. The world is as we have wrought it, nothing more, and nothing less. It is as it should be, only human beings would dare to think otherwise, after all we made it this way, and unless we as a whole (that is the entire of the human race) collectively do something to reverse the trend, I’m afraid we are headed toward the cliffs edge at a blistering pace, Oooh shiny…..

When people inquire of me where I see the modern age going, I just reply, you truly do not want to know what I see, history does not repeat, but it certainly rhymes.